Looking for Meaning In Life?

Maybe What You’re Really Looking for Is Yourself.”

As humans, we’re wired to make meaning. From the moment we arrive in this world, our internal system begins to interpret, filter, and adapt. We do this not because we’re broken, but because we’re beautifully complex. We create inner frameworks to survive, to belong, to feel safe. We generalise. We delete. We distort. It’s not a failing; it’s protective.

But here's the tender truth:
When a part of us searches endlessly for meaning, when we ask What’s the point of this? Why am I here? What’s my purpose? It’s often a protector speaking. A part trying desperately to guard us against the pain of uncertainty, the ache of disconnection, or the fear that we’re somehow not enough.

We are born whole. That’s not a metaphor, it’s a truth.
At birth, we are Self-led. Open. Connected. Wise. Present.
But as life happens, whether through trauma, misattunement, cultural conditioning, or subtle but chronic disappointments, parts of us step in to protect our wholeness.

They try to make sense of the chaos.
They create beliefs to help us cope.
They tell us stories like:
You have to achieve to be worthy. You’re not safe unless you’re in control. You can’t trust anyone. Life has to mean something or it’s unbearable.

And so begins the quest.
We start looking out there for meaning. We chase answers, people, systems, identities, even spiritual paths. Not realising that much of the seeking is orchestrated by protectors who are trying to prevent pain, not open us to life.

But here's the paradox:
The very parts that try to protect us from suffering may end up keeping us from fully living. They hold back our vulnerability. They filter our experiences. They reduce the richness of life to a puzzle to solve, rather than a presence to feel.

And so we spend our lives seeking something that was never lost, only hidden.

IFS teaches us that we don’t have to push those protectors away. We don’t need to shame them for striving or intellectualising or overanalysing. We befriend them.
We get curious. We listen.

And when we do, something beautiful happens.
The parts that were carrying the burden of needing to “find meaning” begin to soften.
We realise:
I was never lost. I was just layered in protection.
I don’t need to find meaning, I need to remember my wholeness.

The meaning of life is not a riddle to be solved.
It is the felt experience of being fully alive.
And that begins, always, with turning inward.

So instead of asking, What’s the meaning of life?
Perhaps the better question is:
What part of me is asking? And what is it trying to protect me from feeling?

Because the truth is, you were born whole.
You are already everything you’ve been searching for.
And the journey isn’t out there—it’s a coming home.

In abundant love and kindness for all gentle souls,

Angela XOX